DAY 8: To-do List

At the start of Week 2, my progress is:

I read my Advantages Response Card at least twice.

I read other Response Cards as needed.

I ate slowly, sitting down and noticing every bite: Most of the Time

I gave myself credit when I engaged in helpful dieting behaviors: Every Time

I resolved to schedule dieting when I begin working again


CREDIT ACCOUNT: $3.75

I still haven't found a green rubber bracelet around here and I don't want to wait for mail delivery, but I remembered to give myself credit every time today anyway! It is still a struggle to remember, even though I am doing better, so I still need to figure out a reminder system.

Sometimes I wonder if I deserve credit for "I ate slowly, sitting down and noticing every bite". I do sit down to eat, and I do eat slowly (so much that I feel like a cow chewing her cud!), but I tend to zone out while I'm doing it. So even though I'm noticing most bites, savoring the flavor and textures of my food, I can't honestly say I've noticed every single bite. Perfectionism is a trap though, so I will continue to give myself credit for the amazing effort I'm putting into this step.

Another example of how well I'm doing with this step is that I couldn't finish a snack today! One of my favorite snacks is a bag of microwave popcorn -- it's whole grains so it fills me up and I get a lot for under 100 calories. Usually I stuff handfuls of it into my mouth, but eating slowly and mindfully, today I was eating it one kernel at a time. I was also reading a book while I ate (I couldn't sit still doing nothing for as long as it takes to eat a bag of popcorn one kernel at a time!), but still I was noticing the creamy butter flavor, the tangy saltiness, the satisfying crunch. And I noticed that I was eating much slower than I would have expected, reaching for a kernel less and less often. And then I noticed I was full and finished eating -- even though I still had a third of the bag left! That in itself was amazing, that a portion that I considered normal was too much for me now. But then... I threw away the leftovers! This concept is such an epiphany for me, the idea that I don't have to eat everything I see, especially when I'm not even hungry. I'm so proud of myself!

At the same time, I'm worried that I'm not eating enough. I don't feel hungry, so I don't eat. Which sounds like a good thing, but yesterday it meant I ate only 900 calories. I never felt deprived or hungry, in fact I felt quite satisfied and full, but it's not healthy for me to eat fewer than 1,200 calories a day. So today I made an effort to eat everything on my plan, even though sometimes I was eating only because I felt like I should. I did skip one of the snacks, and I still ate smaller amounts, but I felt better about my nutrition. And I'm still proud of my smaller appetite!

But that's not all! I'm exceedingly proud of my exercise efforts today. In addition to going to my class at the gym, I made a spur-of-the-moment decision to take an hour-long walk after dropping of my library books. I rock!