DAY 25: What Was I Thinking?

Day 25 is all about learning to identify sabotaging thoughts.

Dr. Beck uses the term "sabotaging thoughts" for the excuses that we make to ourselves when we decide to go off our diets. Today's task, which she notes may take a few days, is to record my excuses, my "sabotaging thoughts", as I notice them. She offers this advice on identifying these sabotaging thoughts: "If you notice that you're tempted to eat something that you're not supposed to eat, ask yourself, What was just going through my mind?..."

Certainly I have had sabotaging thoughts, some of which I identified back on Day 19. But those are all old news; the new-and-improved me doesn't have sabotaging thoughts, so this task is a non-starter for me.

Another pointless step, *sigh*. I should be pleased that I'm not struggling much with dieting this time, but I do feel disappointed that I'm not getting something more concrete out of the program this week. But I need to stay motivated to make it through to next week's challenges!

Today, I'm focusing instead on my plan for dinner tonight. I'll be joining some friends at our usual Mexican place, where typically I have a margarita while devouring almost an entire basket of tortilla chips and salsa. Then I have all of an entree too, and they're large servings of the Mexican staples: cheese and bread and meat. I'm embarrassed to say how many times I've left that restaurant with my pants cutting off circulation to my feet... But tonight will be different! I have a plan to stick to my food plan.

My food plan calls for allowing myself 12 chips with salsa and a cocktail with dinner (all things in moderation). Then I'm going to order a green salad that comes in a bowl the size of a bathroom sink and is topped with chicken, bacon, blue cheese, avocado, corn, and red peppers. Mmm, it's deliciously flavorful but has only 650 calories! And I'm only going to eat 325 calories worth of it tonight; I will push half of the salad aside to take home for dinner tomorrow.

That's the plan and I'm pretty sure I can do it, but I'm a little nervous because this is a situation where my bad habits are strongly forged. Finally, a test of my Beck Diet Solution skills!